Pregnancy
Questions from
viewers about pregnancy,
and
Doctor Leon’s common sense advice.
Linda – My ex boyfriend says I should get an abortion, but
I am scared to. My parents don’t care. They say the boy made this
happen and he should do something about it. My priest told me I can
not have an abortion, but my parents told me I could not have a baby
and keep it at home. I am only 15 years old and my boyfriend found
another girl. I don’t know how to get a job but I need the money if
my parents kick me out. What should I do?
Doctor Leon – Your problem relates more to a lack of
financial resources than a mental abnormality. I could be more
specific, but you didn’t indicate whether your pregnancy was caused
by your boyfriend or your priest. Here are a few suggestions. If
caused by the priest, go to his superior and spill the beans. The
church will probably pay well for your silence on the matter. If the
church won’t pay, sell your story to the National Enquirer. If
caused by your boyfriend, go to a chiropractor and tell him your neck
has been hurting since the last time you engaged in sex with your
boyfriend. He will verify that you are legitimately injured (they
always do), and you can then sue your boyfriend (or his parents, if he
is a minor) for physical assault. They will probably settle out of
court to avoid the embarrassment. If you feel uncomfortable suing your
ex-boyfriend, and your pregnancy is not physically obvious yet, find
another boyfriend quickly, have unprotected sex with him, and start
the legal process all over. That could work if the new boyfriend is
too stupid to request a DNA test to confirm responsibility for the
pregnancy. You can have the baby (I presume your parents will still
allow you to remain at home while you carry), and then offer the child
for adoption. If you engage the right attorney, this could be a very
lucrative opportunity. You might even want to try it again. Check
federal and state laws first though. Check the laws yourself - an
attorney will do it whether or not its legal, if the money is right.
Finally, once you’ve learned your lesson this time around, next time
keep your legs closed, charge for it, or force your male partner to
use a condom. If not, you could get a really bad reputation (or a good
one, depending on how you look at it).
